The Case of the Missing Socks

I’m showing my age. About two and a half weeks ago I passed out on my couch (been doing that a few times lately), and in the morning it was evident that I’d slept on my wrist wrong, bent all the way back. A younger version of me would shrug it off and go about his business, but these old joints don’t take kindly to such punishment, and even now the wrist smarts whenever I use it to support myself too much when getting up.

Conference was a thing that was fun. Had the sister missionaries, a recent convert, and an investigator over to watch both sessions. Aside from the great talks, one thing stood out to me: they still used the “all opposed, please indicate by the same sign” mechanism for indicating opportunity to voice dissent. I think it’s been clear for some time that, with the global nature of the Church, this gesture has been a relatively perfunctory cultural hold-over. But there’s ostensibly been an opportunity to actually get there in-person to raise your hand if you really care (or do more than that if you really really care).

Now though, with an in-person audience of approximately zero, the gesture is conclusively pro forma. I kinda wonder what sort of conversations have been had on the topic. On the one hand, if they stop even verbalizing an offer to dissent, it could be construed as “we don’t care.” On the other hand, it seems like they’d need to invest quite a few resources in building up robust online infrastructure for collecting, collating, dispatching, tracking, triaging, and resolving registered “opposition” votes, for something that has really been a formality for some time anyways. Shrug.

The evening of conference I went to what I learned to be a regular Sunday-night get-together at Bishop’s place, to watch Book of Mormon videos. We watched the one where Ammon meets and converts King Lamoni. I couldn’t help but compare the video to the Living Scriptures rendition, and the comparison was not that favorable to the modern take. If I had to make an analogy, it would be the modern-day Lion King to the animated original. I won’t wax poetic or anything, just not my cup of tea.

My team, like most others at Google, works remotely. However, unlike most other teams, we periodically need to come in to the office to perform certain regular maintenance tasks in a secure room. I went in to help out this last week, and got to see what was going on next door.

This used to be a bit of a strip mall, but has been demolished and will soon become the eighth Google office building in Kirkland. Hope we’ll be able to use it…

While I was in the office, I spent some time swapping desks. Ever since we first moved into the building my team now occupied, I’d admired my teammate Carl’s desk location – perfect view out the window, plenty of room to lean back and swivel. He’s since moved to a new team, and I asked him and my manager if I could swap desks. Mainly for fun given that I would spend very little time there, but it was enjoyable rearranging things anyways.

Speaking of work. I got cc’d on an email chain initiated by a neighbor to our HOA board. They were having complaints about a neighbor who was not keeping their walkway and gutters clear of vegetation, with concerns about liability (delivery people were stepping on their walkway to get to their neighbor’s) and property value. Technically a violation of the CCRs, and apparently there’d been some prior effort on their part to refer the homeowner to outfits who could help out, to no avail. I volunteered to stop in and chat with the neighbor before escalating to any written warnings or anything. Things became more interesting though, when I realized that this person I had to drop by and chat with happened to be a coworker. Not one I knew in any sense, Google is a big place. But it’s put me in a bit of a weird position. I’d like to say “hey actually I work with this guy so could someone else from the board take this on,” but I also don’t want to highlight the association and besmirch the Google name :). I’ll just suck it up and head on over one of these evenings this week.

In sadder news, my trusty 2015 Macbook Pro has reached end-of-life and is no longer supported by Google. I was issued one of these when I first joined, and had it stolen out of a rental car while on a business trip in 2017. At that time Apple had refreshed their MBP line with the shnazzy new touchbar and the “butterfly” keyboard, which cost them quite a bit of public goodwill for being incredibly flaky and prone to breakage. I told them please, I’ll wait weeks if I have to, but could you possibly scrounge up a 2015 model to replace the stolen unit. They helpfully obliged, and the replacement unit has been serving me well ever since.

But I recently noticed my regular backups had been failing, and tech support basically refused to dig into it because the machine was so old. So, replacement time. Luckily at this time Apple has gotten their act together a bit with the keyboard, and upgraded back to one that has much more key travel and reliability than the butterfly model. However, I do have some greivances:

  • While the keyboard is much better than the butterfly one that plagued the lineup since 2016, it really has no redeeming qualities when compared to the old 2015 model’s keyboard. I’m finding myself mis-typing many times an hour because, in Apple’s quest for thin-ness, the keys can’t travel as far when they press.
  • The touchbar is completely useless to me. I never want to use the context-sensitive controls, so I customized it to only contain buttons for the actions I use that row for: screen brightness, keyboard brightness, and volume. So now I’ve traded physical buttons for touch-sensitive ones with zero haptic feedback and a propensity to get mis-clicked when I brush my fingers near that top row. Also the driver must be buggy because many times I find the touchbar using a button layout I did not order. Also, I used to be able to turn the keyboard brightness all the way down on-demand when watching a movie, but that’s gone, since the touchbar does whatever it wants brightness-wise.
  • The trackpad is enormous. Like the touchbar, the palm rejection software is a bit buggy, and several times I find myself zooming when I really just wanted to scroll. Nowhere to rest my fingers below the keyboard either.
  • The USB-C ports have taken over. No USB-A, no HDMI, no SD-card slot.
  • No more Magsafe charger. As handy as it is to occasionally plug the charger into the right side (as you can now charge from any port), it is not worth my fumbling with the charger late at night, wishing for the days when I could just dangle the charger near the port and have it catch.

There are a couple pros though:

  • Sound quality is intensely good.
  • Screen is a bit bigger, 16″ vs 15″, for the same form-factor.
  • Battery life, especially when it gets low, is much improved. My old machine was struggling in that area, which is to be expected for such an old boy.

Oh well, zeroth-world problems. On a positive note, I picked up a pretty groovy new toy: an antique toaster (whose design harks back to the 1940’s) with an ingenious mechanism for toasting and actuating the bread elevation. It also looks pretty spiffy.

Also recently acquired a portable A/C unit from a Googler for a song, will come in handy next summer. Tossed in some artwork as well.

This evening I had a couple of kittens come by for a visit. They’re being taken care of by a friend in the ward, since the shelter can’t have as many volunteers come by as usual. Really seemed to enjoy the change in scenery.

The little one’s name is Cinnamon, and her big brother is named Nutmeg.

Last night was the finale of Lower Decks – been watching it with Dad each weekend, and it’s been a hoot. Saw an article where the showrunner describes season 2, and I’m looking forward to it. Also Discovery season 3.

I recently decided to do something about a few items that needed doing around the house. Recall that I put a fresh hole in my wall while doing cable routing. I also had a deck that frankly needed cleaning when I first moved in 2.75 years ago. And finally, there was a hole in the roof of my garage that I inherited when I bought the place.

If you recall from a couple of posts ago, I met a fellow in a Home Depot parking lot looking for handyman work. I had him come by for an estimate. He arrived in a run-down sedan, which off the bat didn’t inspire a huge amount of confidence. He took a look around and scribbled a few notes on some loose-leaf paper, then came up with an estimate. He noted that I’d need to pay half up front, and pay in cash – a check wouldn’t do it, since it takes two weeks to clear. To be polite I said I’d let him know when I got the cash, sent him on his way, and immediately fired up Yelp looking for a more reputable outfit.

Found a group that did everything I was looking for. Let me know though that at this time of year, with the rain so frequent, they’d need to really thread the needle to get the work done. To resurface the back would need one day to pressure-wash everything, two days of clear skies, a day to apply sealant, and a day – ideally two – afterwards to let it cure.

Luckily a stretch of sunlight came up on the scopes, so they headed over to pressure-wash. Looked fantastic afterwards.

There were a few boards in the back that the handyman mentioned could use replacement, so I headed out to Home Depot to grab some.

When it came time to stain, there was a bit of drama. He knocked on my window and had me come out and see that the pressure washing had not gotten all of the old stain removed, and the semi-transparent stain I’d picked up would not look the best in those parts of the deck. That’s what you get with aged wood.

The ironic part of all this was that I’d originally picked up some redwood solid color stain+sealant, but had a change of heart the night before because I liked the natural look of the wood. Now though, I was hearing that one really should go with a solid color when working with this sort of wood.

So, I left the handymen at my place and rushed off to Home Depot to return what I could of the semi-transparent (bought two cans, returned the un-opened one), and swapped back to the redwood.

When all was said and done, the stain looked awesome on the front gate, but… not so much out back.

It’s kinda loud, clashes with the vegetation. In retrospect I really should’ve gone with a brown or dark green. Oh well, that’s a very expensive lesson I’ve learned: always test your colors out before paying people to come by and paint with them. And find someone who knows colors.

The other projects finished up nicely though.

Now, with all this foot traffic in my place over the last while, I’m growing a bit paranoid. See, I’ve somehow misplaced basically all of my socks.

Pictured here is essentially my entire collection of day-to-day socks. I really do not know what happened to the rest. Could’ve sworn I had a ton piled up down in the laundry room, but I’ve looked everywhere and cannot find anything besides these.

Let’s just say that I’m now one of those old folks who really enjoys receiving socks for Christmas.

Quarantine++

Shorter update this week. Prior to my last trip home, I’d developed a bit of a coping mechanism for dealing with Covid restrictions. I’d open my garage door, set out a folding lawn chair in my driveway, and work outdoors. Great way to get some Vitamin D and meet the neighbors.

This last week has been comparatively insular, since we’ve been blessed with a caustic blanket of smoke, courtesy of global warming and poor forest fire management. Thankfully we’re through the worst of it up here.

During the week I had the sister missionaries over – one of them needed a blessing of comfort and counsel, to help her deal with this latest set of conditions entirely inimical to conducting productive missionary business. Afterwards I treated them to a ride in Shadowfax, and we had a great time zooming around a local church parking lot. Pretty proud of myself for not hitting anything, given the density of obstructions and the lateness of the hour.

Friday it drizzled, and Saturday it poured, washing away the worst of the smog. That evening I had the sisters over for dinner and then went with them to a get-together in a park with several others, where we all played cards at a park bench under a roof. Last time I hung with this crowd I taught them Scum, and it’s a new favorite.

We got inventive with light sources.

Sunday has been pretty quiet. Watched the 1998 animated Mulan film, and it is so good. Plenty of jokes I never got as a kid.

There’s a couple of presentations at work I’m enjoying preparing for, related to post-quantum cryptography. Very fascinating stuff. I’ll have to regale you all next time I’m in town.

To finish off this post, I’m rewatching bits of the edited Shawshank on Plex, and I got curious on a few parts the edited version skipped over. Turns out there’s this fantastic scene that the editors decided to leave out, and I have no idea why. I’ll quote it here.

121	EXT -- EXERCISE YARD -- SHAWSHANK -- DAY (1954) 121

	Andy reads the letter to Red and the others: 

				ANDY 
		P.S. Tell Heywood I'm sorry I put a 
		knife to his throat. No hard feelings. 

	A long silence. Andy folds the letter, puts it away. Softly: 

				RED 
		He should'a died in here, goddamn it. 

122	INT -- PRISON LIBRARY -- DAY (1954) 122

	Andy is sorting books on the cart. He replaces a stack on the
	shelf -- and pauses, noticing a line of ants crawling up the
	wood. He glances up. The ants disappear over the top. He pulls
	a chair over and stands on it, peers cautiously over. 

				ANDY 
		Red! 

	Red steps in with an armload of files. Andy gingerly reaches
	in, grabs a black feathered wing, and pulls out a dead crow.

				RED 
			(softly) 
		Is that Jake? 

123	INT -- WOOD SHOP -- DAY (1954) 123

	Red is making something at his bench, sanding and planing. 

				RED (V.O.) 
		It never would have occurred to us, 
		if not for Andy. It was his idea. 
		We all agreed it was the right 
		thing to do... 

124	EXT -- FIELDS -- DAY (1954) 124

	Low hilly terrain all around. A HUNDRED CONS are at work in 
	the fields. GUARDS patrol with carbines, keeping a sharp eye.
	We find Andy, Red, and the boys working with picks and 
	shovels. They glance over to the pickup truck. Hadley's 
	chewing the fat with Mert and Youngblood. A WHISTLE BLOWS. 

				GUARD 
		Water break! Five minutes! 

	The work stops. Cons head for the pickup truck, where water is
	dispensed with dipper and pail. Red and the boys look to Andy.
	Andy nods. Now's the time. The group moves off through the 
	confusion, using it as cover. They head up the slope of a 
	nearby hill and quickly decide on a suitable spot. The 
	guards haven't noticed. 

	Jigger and Floyd start swinging picks into the soft earth, 
	quickly ripping out a hole. Red reaches into his jacket and 
	pulls out a beautiful wooden box, carefully stained and 
	varnished. He shows it around to nods of approval. 

				ANDY 
		That's real pretty, Red. Nice work. 

				HEYWOOD 
		Shovel man in. Watch the dirt. 

124 	CONTINUED 124
	Heywood jumps in and starts spading out the hole. 

125 	BY THE TRUCK 125

	Youngblood glances up and sees the men on the slope. 

				YOUNGBLOOD 
		What the ****. 

				HADLEY 
			(follows his gaze) 
		HEY.' YOU MEN UP THERE.' GET YOUR 
		***ES OFF THAT SLOPE! 
			(works his rifle bolt) 
		YOU HAPPY ***HOLES GONE DEAF? YOU 
		GOT FIVE SECONDS 'FORE I SHOOT 
		SOMEBODY! 

	Suddenly, other cons start breaking away in groups, dozens of
	them heading toward the slope. The guards look around. 

				HADLEY 
		What am I, talkin' to myself? 

126 	ON THE SLOPE 126

	Andy pulls a towel-wrapped bundle from his jacket and unfolds
	it. Jake. Andy lays him in the box, followed by Brook's 
	letter. Red places the casket in the hole. A moment of 
	silence. Andy gives Red with an encouraging nod. 

				RED 
		Lord. Brooks was a sinner. Jake was 
		just a crow. Neither was much to 
		look at. Both got institutionalized. 
		See what you can do for 'em. Amen. 

	Muttered "amens" all around. The boys shovel dirt onto the 
	small grave and tamp it down.

I’m Back!

It’s been a while since I last wrote – two months in fact. My reticence comes not from the relative monotony of life up my way, but from a letter I received in the mail back in June. The letter advertised symmetric gigabit fiber Internet at my location, for about $30 cheaper than I was paying Comcast for my 250mbps down / 5mbps up. I signed right up.

July came and a technician arrived to take care of installation. A prior owner had already had fiber installed, so it was just a matter of upgrading the box and deciding where the ethernet line should go. And that was the sticking point. I wanted the line to come out by the existing coax line, in the corner of my living room, so I wouldn’t have to move any of my equipment. But the technician demurred, as he wasn’t equipped to run the ethernet cable from the garage the under the crawlspace and start drilling around under there.

So I brought my router down to the garage and plugged it in, figuring I’d arrange for an electrician to come down and take care of it in short order. There were a few other things around the house that needed an electrician, anyways.

Well a month or so passed and I finally got around to actually getting an electrician over. When I got the quote I was taken aback, over $600 just to run the ethernet cable. Figured I’d eventually get around to getting a second quote, and in the meantime just carry on as I had been.

Which, by the way, wasn’t the best arrangement. Only my router made it down to the basement; my home server remained upstairs and offline, as I didn’t want it to inhale garage dust. So no Plex, no blog.

Also, no way to voice-command my smart lights, as the command-and-control hub also remained upstairs (though, now that I think of it, I could’ve just retrieved it from beneath my couch and moved it to the basement, oh well). Not only voice commands but also timed actions were down – usually my lights would turn themselves on and off at certain hours. Coming back home late at night and having to turn on lights myself reminds me of the scene in The Dark Knight Rises when Bruce Wayne comes home and Alfred isn’t there to greet him.

One positive thing did come out of the home server being knocked offline. A year or so ago I got a bit nervous about how long my home server’s hard drives had been spinning. It isn’t unheard of for such drives to start going bad about five years into service, especially if they’re spinning constantly, as mine have been. When I built my machine I got a case with room for six disks, but only filled it with three: one solid-state boot drive, and two 4TB hard drives. So I ordered two more 4TB drives, with the intention of inserting them and figuring out some means of backing up data from my first two drives to the second two. Perhaps with an rsync job added to my crontab, or making a RAID 1 array (though without a RAID controller I’d need to use software, which might slow down performance).

But I never could bring myself to go through all the trouble of taking the home server offline and taking apart my little pile of interconnected tech to get at the server. So the drives just sat under my corner chair for a year or so. Until I realized what a great opportunity it’d be to get it done, so I did.

Anyways, back to the task at hand. I resolved to just do the wiring job myself, rather than wait for a second quote. I arranged for Dad’s ethernet terminator tool to make its way up here with Hayden and Mattie, and eventually planned on doing something useful with it. But I kept dragging my feet, until the latest stint home (which was awesome, may address it in a follow-up blog post), where Hayden mentioned he really missed the blog. I resolved then to make like the Nike logo and Just Do It.

So on Saturday I headed to Home Depot and got some tools. A jab saw to cut a hole in the drywall, a little orange box for mounting wall panels, and an ethernet wall jack panel. I also got some cleaner and stain / sealant for my deck while I was at it. Met a fellow in the parking lot looking for handyman work by happenstance, and arranged to have him come by this week for a quote on the deck work.

Halloween season at Home Depot.

First order of business was to cut the hole in the wall for the new ethernet wall plate. Upon inspection though, I saw an opportunity to avoid any wall cutting at all – I removed the existing coax wall plate and found the cable snaking through a hole in the back corner. I drilled a second hole in the box and figured I could route the ethernet cable up from above and into the new hole.

Time to head down to the crawlspace. My first time ever going down there.

Crawled my way to the very back of the house. Met some friends along the way, including the desiccated corpse of a rat that must’ve eaten some poison and come down to die.

Reached the point where the coax went up, and… it traveled through a hole in some horizontal plywood. Dag nabbit. I could drill a second hole through the plywood and thread ethernet through it, but without opening it way up there’d be no way to get the cable routed into the box.

I found a ton of 2-foot-long small straight metal wire things down there, no idea what they were for, but they made for good makeshift tools in a pinch. I headed top-side and used a few to poke down from the hole in the box, trying to probe where the hole was that the existing cable was going through. I figured that if I could get part of the wire down where I could get at it beneath, I could tape the ethernet cable to it and pull it up through the box. But no joy. I even tried cobbling together a makeshift “ring” of sorts, attached to the metal wire and wrapped around the coax cable. Figured that would keep the wire bound to the coax on the way down to the plywood base, but it came loose every time.

The nuclear option was to just drill through the hard-wood floor. But I really didn’t want to do that. So my next option was to move forward with cutting a hole in the drywall. I actually figured I could do it just below the existing coax wall plate, which would make it easier to get at the wire if I were to just push it up from below.

Well I got to cutting, and then hit a point where the jab saw wasn’t going in any further. I took a drill to it and came up with plywood flakes. Ugh.

In the middle of all this not one but both of my drill batteries died. I put them on the charger but was worried because I couldn’t tell whether the blinking pattern meant “charging” or “replace batteries” – I’d obtained them all when I first moved out here four years ago, so who knows.

In the meantime I was mentally preparing to head out and rent a jigsaw the next day. I was gonna get this done, gorammit. But then, I had an epiphany. Which would’ve been nicer to have had before I started cutting, but such is life.

When I first moved in, I noticed that the prior owners must have arranged to mount the TV on the same wall I was cutting into, above where my couch is now. I had realized this because there were two holes cut in the wall: one that is up at the height one might mount a TV (now hidden by my wall hangings), and one exactly below it, at the same height as the coax cable box. These holes were meant to allow one to run cables from the TV down to the A/V equipment, but I was about to make better use of them.

I reached down behind the couch and yup, sure enough, I could fit my hand neatly through, feeling insulation. I would need my drill for the second part. I went to check on the charging situation and the battery was nice and full, woot woot.

Before I headed down, I needed to get my bearings, to know where to drill. I somehow lost track of my tape measure some time back, so I got some rope and tied a knot indicating the distance from the hole in the wall to the nearest air vent.

Once more unto the breach. I clambered into position, for the fifth time wishing I had knee pads. Had to free some insulation to get at the place I needed to drill, at which point I realized what those long metal thingies were being used for: trusses that held the insulation up between the floor joists. Neat.

Drilled the hole, and threaded the cable up. I realized though that that cable would likely just be flopping around in the insulation, and there’d be no way I’d get to it from above. I had an idea though. I widened the hole a bit, then used some (actual) duct tape someone left beneath the crawlspace to attach the end of the cable to one of those metal things. I then threaded the thing-and-cable assembly up through the hole, as high as it’d go.

Back out and up to the living room. I washed my hands, put a towel over the couch where I’d need to kneel on it, then reached down and stuck my hand through. Never before had I felt such a lovely thing as then: a crinkly vertical rod that had not been there before. Glad my shared wall is such a good sound insulator, might’ve woken the neighbor’s baby with my whooping 🙂

I threaded the cable down until I could get at its end, then routed it back up and through the hole. Huzzah.

Then it was just a matter of terminating both ends, moving the router back up to the living room, turning my phone’s airplane mode on and enabling WiFi, and confirming I had a good connection. I then cleaned the area up, reassembled my little tech cabinet, and all was right with the world.

In a happy accident of timing, I happened to plug everything back in and power it up at what must’ve been like 6:57pm. At the top of the hour, all the lights in the house turned themselves on, right on schedule, first time doing that in two months.

I still need to head back down to the crawlspace and use zip ties to attach the ethernet cable to the coax cable, just to tidy things up. But that can wait till another day.

And of course I do need to find a way to repair the wall damage left over from my erstwhile attempt to carve a new hole in it. Until then it’s a badge of honor, a battle scar.

Since my home server came back online it’s been a bit of an adventure dusting it off. My HTTPS certificates have since expired, and of course my home’s IP address has changed, invalidating my existing DNS records. Couldn’t renew my HTTPS certs until the DNS records were fixed (since it uses the ACME protocol developed by LetsEncrypt which requires I prove control of an HTTP server reachable by way of the domain names I want certs for). And I was waiting on my dynamic DNS daemon to kick in and refresh my DNS records using the new IP address. But as much as I scoured I couldn’t actually find any evidence of an existing dynamic DNS config. So weird. I ended up just logging into my nameserver account and manually updating the IP addresses on all my domain names. I figure eventually something on my machine might have reached out and done the job, but I was impatient. Waited a bit for the DNS update to propagate, renewed HTTPS certs, and now my server is back in business.

(Update 09/16/20 – guess my IP address changes more frequently than before, and my machine wasn’t set up to update it dynamically. Thanks for the heads up Hayden 🙂 Got that sorted, so now my domain IP address should keep track of what my ISP is doing.)

Love y’all! Here’s hoping we can keep Lambert Park from going up in flames this season, would be such a 2020 thing to happen 🙂